Ok It’s done. The guessing and spoiling is over for another 9 months leaving us with only a serious fangover and an unprecedented post season body count. True Blood Season 4 was bat shit crazy even more than Season 3, the timeline of such memorables as jar of Talbot and spine ripping TV. So now post Season 4 finale whether you were calling for a Scream award or thought the whole thing blew chances are you’re about to embark on 9 months of TB withdrawal. Yup even the haters feel its absence. So let’s savor the moment in a post finale look at the best and worst of True Blood Season 4
THE BIGGEST THANK GOD MOMENT:
Wee Marcus and gang finally putting Tommy and us out of the misery that was Tommy Mickens sorry ass life. As soon as he went skinwalker you knew his days were numbered. Sam Tramwell was brilliant doing Tommy doing him and who didn’t cheer when said Tommy/Sam fired Sookie! She is the worst waitress ever! Talk about sick leave; is she ever at work for more than half a shift!?! The fall out from his death will certainly carry us through season 5, where we can only hope Sam has some modicum of hope at returning to just running the bar and attending anger management sessions.
Close second was Sookie decisively shooting Debbie Pelt in the head, even though she begged her not to. Yup, we had to wait till the very end of the season for evil, laughing while pouring Talbot down the drain Sookie, to return.
BEST OMG MOMENT:
Ginger riding the coffin – nuff said.
Scary and sexy are often one and the same on True Blood, and this year Eric Northman ripping out, here to be known as, Juice Box Roy’s heart will be stamped on my brain as a shining TB moment. Countless screamed everywhere, I had know idea THAT could be sexy! Give SkarsgÃ¥rd a raise!
BTW the T-shirts were on sale a mere 3 hours post show.
BIGGEST WTF MOMENT:
Sookie and Eric snow shower then frak in Narnia. I’ve never read the books but the post Spellbound roar over The Vampire, The Witch and The Shower Stall, chocked up the blog commentary for days. I suspect because nothing could ever live up to this sacred cow of the sookiverse sexcapdes, Ball and company for better or worse decided not to go there; thus sparing us from more Skinmax test reels by getting out of the shower faster than they got in
King Bill – sure he’s damaged goods nailing his great great great great granddaughter and watching his ex screw his brain-damaged frenemy but sans Sookie round his neck, Bill was standing a bit taller this year. He even had a sense of humor, and Bill with balls is actually kind of hot. The developing bromance between him and Eric turned out to be one of the best parts of the season close.
Laurel and Hardy move over. With Sookie out of the way Bill and Eric make an an awesome tag team, dissing each other on the pyre then cooperatively staking and decapitating Nan and troopers. Here’s to more of Bill and Eric’s excellent adventure in Season 5.
MOST IN NEED OF IMPROVEMENT:
Sookie got enough of her spunk back to blow Debbie Pelt’s head off, sure, but seriously she spent most of the season literally on her back, well sometimes on top. She was once a gifted mind-reader; we saw that maybe twice this season. Instead we learned more about her castrating powers when it comes to boyfriends. She mommied Eric into a hoody wearing puppy dog, did the dirty with him in every room of grandma’s house and then kicked him, alongside Bill, to the curb come finale. In four seasons she truly did go from virgin to love em and leave em fangbanger. The classless moves have got to stop if the Stackhouse angle is to survive. We need an even slightly relate-able protagonist. I’m hoping another eligible lady moves to town, though god forbid she get a job at Merlotts – the most dangerous workplace in America.
SOOKIE’S ONE REDEEMING FEATURE SEASON 4:
Sookie had unbelievably great hair this season. I swear to god I saw the camera man reflected in her locks in Eric’s cubby.
MOST IN NEED OF A HUG:
From defending herself against zombie slurs to losing an ear, Pam had endured what must go down as the worst week in her hundred plus years. She lost her maker to back country fairy vagina and her face rotted off. And things weren’t exactly looking up when we left her, blood tears running down her cheek, hugging Ginger.
Why did they do that to Pam!!! Well for one reason she gave TB viewers some of the best gore the show has ever delivered. Still, writers, you better fix her. At the end of the day we really just want to look at Kristin Bauer being gorgeous and acting snarky.
Coming in second is Hoyt who despite the bitterness of his bad boyfriend rejection could really use a little lov’in right now, if not some of Summer’s biscuits.
BEST RECAPS and REVIEWS:
#1 Bloodworks takes the stakes as a no contest winner. Besides being just the cutest couple in the world, Brian and Any’s post show cocktails and theatrics amount to sometimes slurry worded and always hilariously astute recaps. I swear by mid season you look forward to Andy and Brian’s upload as much as the episode itself. With its “staking points” and “do bad things” they were the best thing that could happen to a mediocre TB episode.
Brian Juergen and Andy Swist @campbloodbuzz @andyswist
#2 Think Heroes True Blood Review is tried and true. Roth Cornet has hosted solo for two seasons, and this season Jenna Busch was on board. Roth’s reviews are first-rate often delving deeper than the show deserves. Busch does a good job of keeping things in the watercooler-moment mood of the short vlog format. The two combined offer a sometimes giggle ridden but always insightful True Blood take.
Jennings Roth Cornet @JRothC | http://www.jenningsrothcornet.com/
JennaBusch @JennaBusch | http://girlmeetslightsaber.blogspot.com
#3 BloodBites is family friendly fair with this sister and brother team showcasing familial bonds and blood-dipped funny bones. Reenacting then reviewing a given episode’s wtf moments, Blood Bites has cross-gen appeal. It’s quality YouTube content you could show your grandmother and your eight year-old niece, who you know are both watching True Blood too.
My Future Lover’s Reason to Ship Sookie and Eric
Spawn of You Tube strictly for Team Eric members, My Future Lover’s play by play captions to the best and worst Sookie Eric moments capture at least half the audience’s joy, tears and tv punching moments.
True Blood in Dallas Straight up fan founded talkshow and review of both book, show and TB culture with revolving guest reviewers each week. A steady dose of all the criticism only a Stackhouse booklover can bring, Talk Blood is laced with plenty of Charlaine Harris loving that fellow fans can appreciate.
BLOGS AND WEB SITES
Pros and Cons True Blood by Meredith Woerner nails it everytime. for a no holds barred, tell it like is play by play pro con style. This is one of the funniest and most astute TB recaps out there.
Meredith Woerner @MdellW | http://io9.com/people/MeredithDW/posts/
After Eltons WTF recap by Steven Frank is an imaginative post morteum with major plot points reviewed then rated in Grace Jones Vamp limps.
Jef With One F’s music and episode recap for the Houston’s Press is a creative spin that lets the show’s lead track set the tone for review and analysis.
Jef With One F @HPRocksOff
Talk True Blood Digging deep and ranting in the best way, Talk True Blood goes so far as to offer scene by scene body language analysis of major characters.
Buddhism and True Blood Dedicated to Alan Ball and the wheel of life, Buddhism and True blood reminds us that life is suffering especially in Bon Temps
True Blood Underground Do you really know what’s going on in Bon Temps? Conspiracy theories abound as TB Underground calls out Alan Ball on his addictive mind control experiment.
Four seasons later there is still a bit of blood left in the series, and while fairy-finger-cop-outs and super silly, supernatural assumptions do show signs of laziness in the writers room, True Blood still does deliver some amazing TV. Godforbid we get bogged down by process oriented stuff like how amnesia Eric lost his shirt post-spell or ends up on a bonfire tied to Bill between episode 11 and 12. Things like how come no one reports a death in Bon Temp anymore or WHO IS running Merlottes only get in the way of a good story or at least a good “oh no they didn’t” jaw drop.
I suspect, forty eight episodes later, TB writers actually relish every shark jumping moment as much as fangbanging spectacle. They know they can get away with it because they know how dedicated, creative and forgiving their fan base is. Plus narrative logic be damned, camp and drama are fine edges to play on, and they deserve applause for taking even tasteless risks.
For every bit of hocus pocus cgi True Blood throws at us, such as the anime forcefield surrounding Moon Goddess or the ridiculously bad fx exorcism of Mavis, there was a Pam getting a skin peel or Eric ripping the heart out of juice box Roy to make up for it. For each ridiculous Scooby Doo and the gang moment, there was a Vampire A-team or death by pencil. For each and every minute we tolerated Andy, we had a shot of Ginger riding a coffin or Eric drinking the whole fairy. True Blood IS very uneven but it IS very fun.
So that caps summertime Sundays and True blood still remains my ultimate guilty pleasure. The culture and coverage this year has been as much fun as the show itself and made Sundays feel like a party. I think Alex Skarsgard sums it all up in this quote, “At 7 in the morning, I’m hanging from the ceiling in a Nazi uniform with fangs in[my mouth]. I look over and I see [Allan] there in his Nazi uniform hanging like a puppet. Weâ€™re about to descend down to kill this wolf, you know? And that was the moment where we just looked at each other like, This is what were doing for a living!”
Yup, IT IS! And even more surprising I CAN”T believe I’m watching you do it and not only that but loving every minute!